I’ve been writing to the HR person at a certain firm, trying to nail down whether or not I care to actually interview with their firm. An e-mail I received today helped me make up my mind. Here’s what they wrote that really sealed the deal:
“You stated that you would hope to be compensated at a rate of $ per
year. This is certainly attainable within our pay plan. However, it would
not be guaranteed. For the first year in the firm, the pay that you receive
is based primarily on the income that you generate for the firm. For the
first three weeks, there is no salary paid, and you receive 80% of the
income that you generate. Each three week period after that results in an
increase to the base weekly salary, starting at $200, then $300, then $400,
until it reaches $500 per week. With each increase, the accompanying
percentage decreases.”
WHO ARE THEY KIDDING? I’m willing to take a pretty low pay rate-no lie, but I would actually like to be paid for my work. Is that too much to ask? Do they actually expect people to take them up on this offer?
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Lady in the Red 
Wow. That’s just about the biggest load of crap I’ve ever seen.
You’ve got to be kidding me. This seems like the most round-about way of saying that they require a portable book of business. “Oh no, we won’t put in our ad that you need to bring us clients. Instead, we’ll tell you after you waste the time applying and coordinating an interview with us that you won’t get paid unless you bring us clients within the first three weeks. That seems fair, right? I mean, it’s not like if you had your own clients you’d be working on your own versus giving us the cost of overhead, right? You want to give us your clients, don’t you?!? DON’T YOU?!?!”
Yeah, jerk-off. I want to bring you my clients. I have them all lined up but have been waiting for the right firm to give them to so that I can take a cut in what I would be making *if you didn’t exist.*.
Wow. Sometimes I can see why lawyers get the sneaky-snakey-snake reputation. And I’m a lawyer. Sigh.
Some lawyers are very sneaky snakes, and apparently tight-wads to boot. This was indeed a huge load of crap. I don’t know who went to school to do volunteer work professionally, but I certainly did not.